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outside orang's avatar

I liked how we were thrown right into without exposition, It made me read quickly because I wanted to understand what was happening.

I think having a quick description of what kind of battle Samwick is in the middle of early on would be nice. I wasn't sure if he was being pursued by other flying beasts when you mention the flecks all around, or if there's a larger battle occurring in both air and on the ground with mention of quarrels being shot.

I liked the switch to Fendrys pov, it leaves you wondering what happened to samwick. Her internal dialogue of comparing the beast to a horse and her concern for it displayed her personality right off

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Mkwawa shujaa's avatar

I loved the way the Kingsbeast responded to her, that moment felt magical. Looking forward to chapter 2.

I also have a personal question about the story that I left in your inbox. I hope you can check it out.

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